Friday, May 28, 2010

The World Is a Vampire: A Four Part Series

Part 1-The Metaphors

Common sense is not so common ~ Voltaire

I'm surrounded by a pack of idiot zombies. Vampires. In fact...I'm playing a game of hot potato with them. But in this game...I am always left holding the potato. And I really would like to pass it back...but they won't have a 'hot' clue what to do with it. So now we play this my way.

Enter the Ninja.

Part 2-The Horoscope

GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You're almost there. Take a deep breath and stay on it for just a little while longer. The payoff is worth it. If nothing else, you'll be through the process and free to make new choices.

Part 3 - Faith and The Angels

Your unconditional faith in my ability to do the right thing amazes me. If you believe....than I know I can too. Thank you for keeping an eye out and providing me with the strength, knowledge and love to see this through.

Part 4 - The Journey

Learn from yesterday. Live for today. Hope for tomorrow. We shall conquer together.

Mad, adj.: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. ~Ambrose Bierce

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

You say it best...

When you say nothing at all....

Don't write a letter when you're mad ~ Chinese Proverb

Always write angry letters to your enemies. Never mail them. ~James Fallows

If you don't have anything nice to say...don't say anything. -Moms everywhere

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. ~Ambrose Bierce

Sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. ~Author Unknown

There is nothing more galling to angry people than the coolness of those on whom they wish to vent their spleen. ~Alexandre Dumas

Tuesday, May 18, 2010


What I've Learned

I've learned that you can't make someone love you
All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in

I've learned that no matter how much I care,
Some people are just assholes

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust
And it only takes suspicion, not proof to destroy it

I've learned that you can get by on charm for about 15 minutes
After that you better have a big weenie or honkin' horns

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others
They are more screwed up than you think

I've learned that you you can keep puking
Long after you think you've finished

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do
Unless we are celebrities

I've learned that regardless of how hot & steamy a relationship is
The passion fades and there better be a lot of money in place

I've learned that we don't have to ditch bad friends
Because their dysfunction makes us feel better about ourselves

I've learned no matter how you try to protect your children
They'll eventually get arrested and end up in the paper

I've learned that the people you care most about in life
Are taken from you too soon
And the less important ones just never go away

I've learned to say "F" em if they can't take a joke
In six languages

Sunday, May 16, 2010

First thing to do is.....

I am a paper hoarder for good reason.

This has meant a lot to me over time, and it's the place I've always wanted to be.
It is now.

The Awakening

A time comes in your life when you finally get it...when in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside you head cris out ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying and struggling to hold on! And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through te mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening.........

You realize it's time to stop hoping, and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon.

You come to terms with the fact that he or she is not Prince or Princess Charming and you are not Cinderella or Cinderfella and in the real world, there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of 'happily ever after' must begin with you, and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of you or what you are...and that's Ok (they are entitled to their own views and opinions) You learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process a sense of newfound confidence is born of self-approval.
You stop criticizing and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do to you).
You learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. You learn people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are, and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties, and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is as a result of the messages and opinons that have been ingrained into your psyche. You begin to sift through all the beliefs you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you should weigh, what you should wear, where you should shop, what you should drive, how and where you should live, what you should do for a living, who you should sleep with, who you should marry, what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children, or what you owe your parents.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. You begin reassessing and re-defining who you are and what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrow, or should never have bought into to begin with, and in the process you learn to trust your own knowing.

You learn it is truly in giving that we receive, that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a 'consumer' looking for your next fix.

You learn principles such as honesty and integrity are not outdated ideals of a by-gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life. You learn you don't know everything, it's not your job to save the world and you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake. Then, you learn about love, romantic love and familial love.

You learn how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings into a relationship. You learn you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more loveable or important because of the man or woman on your arm or the child that bears your name.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations,and outcomes. You learn just as people grow and change so it is with love...and you learn you don't have the right to demand love on your terms...just to make you happy.

You learn to be alone does not mean lonely...and you look in the mirror, and come to terms with the fact you will never be a size 3 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you 'stack up.'

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs. You learn feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK..and that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things you want...and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands.

You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect and you won't settle for less. You allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you to glorify you with his or her touch...and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect.
You learn your body really is your temple. You care for it and treat it with respect. You also begin by eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and taking more time to exercise. You learn fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear so you take time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul, so you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn, that for the most part in life, you get what you believe you deserve, and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn anything work acheiving is worth working for, and wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn in order to acheive success you need direction, discipline and perseverance.

You also learn no one can do it all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help. You learn the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time, FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know whatever happens you can handle it, and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live on your terms.

You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn life isn't always fair, and you don't always get what you think you deserve and sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn no one is punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It is just life happening.
You learn to deal with evil in its primal state - the ego. You learn negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.
You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon this earth can only dream of: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower.
Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself and to make yoursef a promise to never betray yourself, and to never settle for less than your heart's desire. You hang a wind chime outside your window so you make a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility .

Finally, with courage in your heart and with faith by your side you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.

You're awake.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Look what Spring Brings...


If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome. ~Anne Bradstreet

Spring also brings...
men in tights!

Oooo-dee-lally! That's an expression I use alot...from animated Robin Hood (Disney, 1973). The one where Robin and Maid Marian are foxes....

I am gonna watch this version tonight in prep for the new. Maybe I will watch ALL the versions...

Oooh...Russell will be a mighty 'foxy' Robin!

[about Robin] Sis: "Oh, he's so handsome... just like his reward posters!"

Te he....

Prince John: Oo-dee-lally! A crown! How exciting!
Robin Hood: His face is handsome, regal, majestic, lovable... a cuddly face.
Prince John: Handsome, regal, majestic, ha ha. Lovable, yes, yes. Cuddly. [laughs]
Prince John: Oh, that's me to a tease. It truly is.

All this reminds me of my past as a Medival Princess (maybe I WAS Maid Marian!!)

And that the good guys win sometimes...making me even more thankful for those in my corner, cheering me on! A big Hi 5 for Team Grexy!!

The sunshine has come out...and it's a wonderful new day. The sights and sounds of a sunshiney spring morning greeted me

I did wake up with some odd allergic reaction in my lips, so I looked a lot like Tina Turner circa early days. And I had a dream that Theo Huxtable was my Grade 8 Math teacher. I usually try to find meaning in my dreams....this one I think was pure nonsense. Nothing profound. Which is actually nice...means I slept soundly with not a worry in my mind! Ahhh....

Since yesterday I have been overcome with a sense of peace. That everything WILL be alright. I did know this deep down before. But, now my whole being knows and understands this.
It feels good...It makes me dance around and twirl in my fun dress in the sunshine. It makes me notice the birds, and the clouds.

And google happy quotes to share...

Spring brings to mind daydreams....Like someday wearing this.....

with a poofy dress!

or maybe I will float around in a Misha (say that 5 times fast!!)

or any Marchesa for that matter..(say that 5x fast too!)

Eeeks...don't ya just love, love 'em all!!

Ahhhhh.......springtime...get out there and enjoy...

It's spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you've got it, you want - oh, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so! ~Mark Twain

Valgovinds's Song in the Spring
From my book: India's Love Lyrics

For the month of marriages is drawing near.

The Temple bells are ringing,

The young green corn is springing,

And the marriage month is drawing very near.

I lie hidden in the grass,

And I count the moments pass,

Soon, ah, soon, the women spread

The appointed bridal bed

With hibiscus buds and crimson marriage flowers,

Where, when all the songs are done,

And the dear dark night begun,

I shall hold her in my happy arms for hours.

She is young and very sweet,

From the silver on her feet

To the silver and the flowers in her hair,

And her beauty makes me swoon,

As the Moghra trees at noon

Intoxicate the hot and quivering air.

Ah, I would the hours were fleet

As her silver circled feet,

I am weary of the daytime and the night;

I am weary unto death

Oh my rose with jasmin breath

With this longing for your beauty and your light.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

All Hail Summer 2010!!

Then followed that beautiful season... Summer....
Filled was the air with a dreamy and magical light; and the landscape
Lay as if new created in all the freshness of childhood.
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

10 For 10
Last summer was I got some BIG plans for this one!

1. Eat Mr. Freezies like when I was a kid. So that's LOTS. Lots more than Mom said I could have. I will not hide the empty wrappers behind the freezer. I will have to clean them up now that I am the so called 'grown-up." I will give myself sores on the sides of my mouth I will eat SO many!! YUMMERS! (Result: Made me rather ill. Mouth sores hurt...but SO YUM! Red still my fav!)

2. Camping. All kinds of camping. I will camp this a way and that a way. I will camp up and I will camp down! I will camp in the rain, and I will camp in the sun. I will camp all over this place. And I will LOVE it!

3. Skinny Dip. What the what!!! I just can't fathom why I have yet to do this. Me n' my birthday suit coming to a lake near you....if you see the moon...don't tell!!

4.Grown-Up Games Day.(Kids can come too!) I want to get all my friends. I want to play old skewl games like Frozen Tag, What Time is it Mr. Wolf?, British Bulldog, Red Rover, Kick the Can/Capture the Flag. We will blow bubbles and have water gun fights, balloons and buckets. A slip n' slide too! We even will create our own 'team' shirts!! Maybe they can be tie-dye...oooh..YES!! I want to do this all day!! . I want to do this all night too! And drink some tequila watermelon, yuknfux, and margaritas too!! Kool-Aid for kids! I want to SO bad! (Result of tequila watermelon. Puckered lips and a sour face. Not drunk enough first I quess!)

5. Plan and Begin 2 Girls Get-Aways. 1 is a Sisters Camping Trip. Me n' My seeestahs... We will sleep in tents and giggle and become one with nature. I will not injure myself. I hope someone knows how to start a fire without gasoline?? Another shall be Girlfriends Getaway. I would like all my ol' maids to rent a cabin. And take that cabin by storm. We will drink wine, and pig out and reminisce!!! It will be a BLAST and we will make it an Annual Gig fo' life!!!

6. Theme Party Time!! I am planning one for my birthday! I heart theme parties.Long time

7. Catch Fireflies in a jar! Maybe frogs too.

8. Play tag in the rain. And make a mud pie after!

9. Get LOST! Yup...i want to get in the car, turn this way, that way and just go. Just end up where we end up. Explore. Find a new place

10. Make Homemade Ice Cream. That tastes good.

Build a sandcastle, fly a kite, have a lemonade stand. Watch the stars, go hiking, read a trashy beach novel, (LC's book anyone?)Try golfing again with less anger this time. Plan a scavenger/treasure hunt! See Eclipse, Prince of Persia and Robin Hood. Play ball, drink beer and eat spitz. Oh...Summer......Zee many adventures of Summer!! I am gonna love it HARD!

Whatchu gonna do???

Thursday, May 6, 2010

I should try drinking less coffee....

"There is no secret to balance. You just have to feel the waves." ~ Frank Hebert